hiii, clearly this blog is becoming my trauma dumping space and I can't even be bothered to get into all of it butttt im sad guys. I'm honestly embarrassed about the whole situation so I won't get into too much detail but basically, I was talking to someone and I felt like they were being distant but they reassured me and I just felt crazy. I've been feeling like that for a few days but then earlier I accidentally stumbled on proof that they weren't busy, just too busy for me.
and sure I could cry and kill myself blah blah OR I could actually change this time. but first I just want to say, every time I''ve lost my mind talking to someone and start being irrational and needy, it's because my heart knows somethings going on I swear! because I've never been wrong and these people are crazy liars and I cannot deal with it anymore!!!! guys help me help me I'm losing my mind. but basically I have finally learned my lesson and unless I've invested 6+ months (realistically more like 3) in someone, if I start to feel that way again, say that it is not working for you and remove yourself from the conversation you crazy bitch.
next steps: how I'll change...
everything happens for a reason and this time your life will change for the better, it's okay to be lonely, you are even lonely when you were talking to these people. take care of yourself and please grow from this.
I appreciate anyone reading this and hopefully you don't relate